I'm Home !!!!!!!!!

Well actually I got home Friday after a horrendous drive home through the torrential rain and even more horrendous spray off the motorway, so I've been resting. Sort of.

One needs ones rest when you get to my 'twilight' years.

Oh, I also had a sort-of fabby birthday too. I got the most fandabeedozee pressie from Lianne and she'd made the most gorgeous tin to put all my pressies in WITH a matching card !!! It is heavenly !

I also got a pair of hip and trendy PJ's from the Heir Apparent, and off hubby I got some knickers and I will eventually (i am lead to believe) get some perfume that i've been after since ... well .... time began. Mum gave me money which is going towards the Fairy Retreat in Feb when I get to meet Sir Tim *insert swooning slobbering smiley* !! MIL & FIL bought me the most chic pair of lush green silky PJ's ... I got money and vouchers off some of my other friends - and I got millions of cards ... well ok ... trillions !!!!!!!!!! It looks like Christmas in the Hysterical household !!

I'm rabbiting again - sorry ....

Well, i've done my motherly and SIL duties during the holiday. I've driven over the Forth Bridge in Scotland four times in four days ... i've driven down more windy flipping Scottish lanes than erm erm ... whatsisname ... erm ... oh yeah .. Braveheart - and I'm now tired and knackered and wiped out .. and things. I'm also back at school tomorrow *insert sad smiley* and I haven't had a break and won't do now until Christmas *insert hysterically sobbing smiley*.

Anyway, my ickle friends and playmates, i'll leave you with a 'wee joke'

An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman were in a pub, talking about their sons. My son was born on St George's Day," commented the English man. "So we obviously decided to call him George" "That's a real coincidence," remarked the Scot. "My son was born on St Andrew's Day, so obviously we decided to call him Andrew." "That's incredible, what a coincidence, "said the Irishman. "Exactly the same thing happened with my son Pancake."

Heh heh ...

The Secret Layout ... and more .... and more ...

Ahem ... thanks Mrs Duck ... but this is my secret layout that I mentioned \/ down there .... it didn't show ... I edited it ... twice .. I swear - and it just hasn't shown up .. anyway .... i'll try again ... aaaah there it is !!! Seeeeee I did have a layout !!!!


Yes, I've been tagged again !!!!!

I have to think of another five weird things about me .... so .......

1. I love cutting my toe nails ... I just can't wait until they start annoying me and I have to chop em ... hmmmmm i love the sound of the crunch as I chop em !

2. I hate beans .. baked, boiled, runner, kidney ... and the worst offender of all .... BUTTER BEANS !!! I mean WTF are they ??? They're gross ... they don't even taste of butter, they taste of cacky cardboard ... yeuch yeuch *puke*

3. Ears. I MUST have clean ears. A nurse once complimented me (well, told me off) by saying that my ears were too clean - I mean what does she want me to have - dirty, grubby, mite infected-potatoes-growing-out-of-them-ears ??? eh ? eh ? She had the nerve to tell me that I should put nothing bigger than an elbow down my ear !!!!! Hmmmm thinking about it, maybe I should go on that long-promised diet, coz maybe then i'd get my elbow down em !!!! I didn't dare mention that my mate Little Sue (long story, but there's big sue, little sue, chinese sue, big big sue, birkenhead sue, school sue ..... dya see where i'm going with this) ... anyway, Little Sue puts knitting needles down her ears to scratch em !!!!!!!!! How gross/bad/excruciating is that ..... anyway, I never snitched on her to the nurse .... *is a good fwend*

Sorry I rabbited for a bit there .............

4. Porridge - i love it ... but ONLY WITH SALT and NO milk - how do people eat such a fine delicacy when its made with milk AND sugar AND jam - how gross is that ..... Porridge should be eaten pure ... with just a ickle bit of salt - lo fat salt of course :)

5. I will only drink out of a china cup or mug - it makes me heave drinking out of a pottery mug, but I will, at a push drink from one of them <>Cough/cold
........ 'tis still ongoing ........ *cough* *cough* *cough*

Farepak Hamper & Voucher doo-dah

Sadly, I was one of the unlucky ones who got 'stung' - but I consider myself lucky in that my gorgeous, wonderful Heir Apparent is more grown up than his young 10 years ... and says he understands. *blubs* ... what did I do to deserve this wonderful boy.

I feel so sorry for the woman with 11 kids who has lost everything .... and the single mum with 3 kids who is on the dole .... there are so many children that are going to go without this year that it breaks my heart.

I ask anyone who reads this blog - please - if you know someone - and please NOT me - who has been stung, would you please put an extra little something in your Christmas shopping basket for one of these kids.

My little un will be ok, I and my family will make sure he is ... but there are people out there who have no means to earn extra money except to go into extra debt, and no family to lend from - so please, please, please think of these children. Thank you xxxx

Soooooooo funny !!!!

"Can I have some Irish Sausages, please?" asked the Irishman,walking up to the counter.The assistant looked at him and asked: "Are you Irish?"

"If I had asked you for Italian sausage, would you ask me if I was Italian? demanded the Irishman indignantly." Or, if I asked forGerman Bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German?" then, warming to his theme, he went on:"Or if I asked you for a Kosher hot dog, would you ask me if I was Jewish? Or, if I asked you for a taco, would you ask me if I was Mexican? Would ya? Would Ya?"

The assistant said: "Well no".

Suitably encouraged by the success of his logic, the Irishman stepsit up a gear. "And if I asked you for frogs legs, would you ask me if Iwas French? What about Danish Bacon, would you ask me if I was Danish?"

"Well, I probably wouldn't," conceded the assistant.

So, now bursting with righteous indignation, the Irishman says,"Well, all right then, why did you ask me if I'm Irish just because I asked for Irish sausages?"

The assistant replied:"Because you're in fecking Homebase."

Bathroom complete

YAY !!! Just waiting to have it photographed now, and then i'll post pics.

Cold/Cough

Ongoing - but Aaron has it now as well.

Birthday

I've received one card and present ... and confess ... I opened it ... sorry but I had to - it was calling out to me !!! How it knew my name i'll never know, but I swear, it shouted to me. I linguered over opening it .... and there it was a fantastic K & CoNeopolitan Accordian Book Kit !!!! I've been looking at these for ages saying yes, no, yes, no ... anyway YES I have one !!!!

*insert a sort of guilty smiley*

Cold/cough - Part 2

I've just been reliably informed whilst typing this up that hubby now has 'the cold' ..... for gods sake he coughed once and sniffed once !!!!!!!

Layout - pictured

This is Aaron taken after a Halloween party at our local pub last year - isn't he adorable !!!

Have I mentioned Parents Evening ?? Right, if I haven't I'll mention it next time.

*is a proud mum*

Its not funny anymore .....

Having a cold/cough/flu .......

Since having my hysterectomy, every time I cough or laugh, I 'slightly' 'pee' myself ... I mean I normally PML ... all the time .. but I do literally PM !!

Since having my latest 'cold/flu/virus/'whatever' I've been peeing myself silly - and i'm now fed up with it *insert sad sad smiley*

HOWEVER ......... this is nothing compared to the amount of tablets I am now taking ... My mother .. who does NOT believe in 'hokey pokey' (alternative) medicine has sent me Selenium tablets to take "to build up my immune system" ...... my MIL has now sent ... garlic capsules (only to be taken at night) and echinacea (sp) (three to start with and one a day when i feel better) ... and thats without my Night Nurse (at night - obviously) and all my heart tablets (of a night only - 1 with food, 2 without food ) !!

Now those who know me, know that I love rocking, rolling and rattling ... but I swear to god (yet again) .. that I am absolutely rattling ... you can hear me 100 miles away ... I am awash with tablets - i HATE HATE HATE tablets ... I feel like a hypochondriac (sp - again) ... with all this excessive tablet taking :(

I don't wanna to be ill, I don't wanna be an invalid - and I don't wanna be full of hocus pocus tablets ...... and more than anything, i don't wanna rattle !!!!!!!!

*insert woe is me smiley*

I am well and truly fed up and p'd off.

*** TGIF ***

Thank god its Friday !!

I'm full of cold and feeling sorry for myself :( I hate, hate, hate being ill :(

We had a chippy for tea, because I couldn't be bothered cooking, and I can't say I particularly liked it coz I just wasn't in the mood ... I shouldn't have had anything really ... thinking about it on reflection ... never mind :(

Design Team

Phew - I've completed all my projects for Little Silver Hat and Scrapfairies DTs. They're photographed and sent - will add them to my slide when Slide.com decides that it likes me again and decides to let me add and delete my photographs :(

Birthday and Christmas :(

Aaron has just given me his Birthday and Christmas list - I think i'll run away now .......>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>.

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<< Hang on .................... its my Birthday before his .... maybe I'll stay long enough to get any presents and then do a runner.

Birthday's are a funny old thing. Your nearest and dearest ask you what you want, and then they buy you something totally random !!! One of my ex's once bought me a whore (got to be said in scouse accent - who-er) red bedtime shawl - I mean wtf was all that about ?????? I asked him, and he said 'well you said you like red' .... erm ... hellloooooooo .... I mean sexy red underwear, or a nice red dress/blouse/pj's ... NOT an old ladies bedtime sodding shawl !!!

My mother once bought me a Kenwood Chef mixer - helllooooooo I don't bake !

And my hubby always buys me CD's .... helloooooooo I have limewire, why would I actually want someone to PAY for CD's for me ???

I must have "Buy her crap presents" stamped all over my head !!!!!

Please understand that I'm not ungrateful ... far from it ... I'd be quite happy with £2 worth of beautiful patterned papers .... or even a sheet of alpha's ... or £2 worth of lush ribbons .... ...... see, i'm not that hard to please.

Anyway, as ones Birthday is looming ... I will keep all you millions of Hysteri-cal blog readers posted !!!!

Dont you ever wish that you were a famous crafter/scrapper/whatever ... and millions of people read your Blog ?? Aaaah well ... i'm grateful, well more than grateful ... in fact, I am ETERNALLY GRATEFUL ... to those who read, but more importantly post here - thank you xxxxxxxxxxxx

Monday Blog ......

If you could change places with someone (be they dead or alive, famous or not) for one day, who would it be and why?

Marilyn Monroe - I was born to be Marilyn Monroe ... in fact, there's a little Marilyn Monroe bursting to get out of me ... its just such a shame that she's hidden behind all this flab .... but she'll emerge one day .... honest !!!

Bathroom - yes, the ongoing saga

The glass we ordered for the shelves was too blurdy big - because its reinforced/strengthened/whatever-you-call-it ... the glazier reckons you can't trim it down, so we've had to re-order it *boo hoo damn and blast* ... It means that my THREE glass shelves have now cost in the region of £130 (including the brackets) .... but my beautiful new towels and matching shower curtains match fabulously well ... and no-one but no-one is allowed to touch the white and cornflower blue ones .... its death if they do - and i'm serious !!!

Geography

I taught one of the best ever Geography classes today - it went brilliantly - and I am tooting my own trumpet and saying even I surpassed myself. Welllll at the end of the day, if I don't toot myself, no bugger else will.

Aaron aka Heir Apparent - growing up etc.

Well my Heir Apparent went for his taster day at his chosen High School. I never slept all night, and the bloody bugger didn't kiss me goodbye ... even though I let him stay school dinners for the day/woke him up/pressed his uniform twice/found all his pens, pencils etc/and picked up all his mates ..... THEN when Stewart dropped em all off, my Heir Apparent didn't even turn around/wave/anything !!! *insert sobbing smiley*

I got to school, got in the staff room and broke my heart crying - dear god, no-one told me how hard it is to start letting go .... I DON'T WANNA LET GO .... I want my baby back .... I'm crap at all this 'give em enough rope' 'let go of the apron string' .... I'm a mum, I love being a mum, my boy is my life .... Somebody slap me - please !!!! Its horrible, awful and downright gut wrenching. I love this boy so much, and I don't want anything awful to happen to him ... so how do I let go ????? Where's the manual telling me how to do it eh ? eh ?

Ok, thats my whinge for the day xxxxxxx

Sunday Prompt

1: Do you have any middle names? Anne

2: Whats under your bed right now? Massive box of photographs and my memory boxes for Aaron.

3: Last time you laughed so much you cried? When I heard that Sarah from www.sarahscards.co.uk had got 6 fertilised eggs for implanting. I said to Lianne, how the hell is she gonna cope with sextuplets ? I didn't realise that they only implant 2 eggs - i'm still chuckling away and that was on Friday. I am a terrible giggler tho, and its normally at the most inopportune moments !!!!!

If you believe in prayers girls - please throw up a couple for Sarah and Ross that their egg implantation is successful.

4: What age were you when you first drank alcohol? 15 - cider !

5: Whats your porn star name? (first pets name and mothers maiden name) Sandy Crichton

6: Whats your desk top photo on your pc Stephen Gerrard - Liverpool FC

7: What did you have for breakfast? Grilled bacon, poached egg , mushrooms and toast

8: Music or Tv? Music

9: Worst out fit you have ever worn? Puff ball skirt or pinafore dress over Birmingham Bags !!!!

10: Where do you feel most at peace? Culzean Castle in Scotland .. its breathtaking and serene.

Aaaargh !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just finishing off the housework and the flipping Dyson has broke - i've had to hand brush down the stairs - yeuch !

Bathroom

Its being finished this afternoon. Oh well, just the boiler to get repaired in two weeks - yes, two weeks - how crap is that !

Bugger ... forgot to Update ... here we go ......

Schools

Well we went to visit the 2nd of schools on Aarons list - and the one that I really, really, really would like him to go to. Yes, they're strict (love it), yes their exam results are incredible (love it) and yes they have accelerated learning (love it even more). It means that if Aaron is capable, then he will sit his GCSE's a year early and then the following year he will sit his AS's.

I am truly desperate to get him in there, the reputation of the school is fantastic, so I was prepared to be overwhelmed by the school ... well College as its called. I was however, surprised by how 'homely' the school felt - especially when I walked down one particular corridor - it was really freaky but this feeling washed over me ... and it felt comforting and homely ??!! I am hoping it was a very good vibe !! So fingers crossed all you Bloggers !!!

Bathroom

Its being finished tomorrow - YAY !!!! Lianne has kindly said that she will come up and take some photographs during the week - so keep your eyes peeled for bathroom photos !!!

Bits and Bobs ....

I haven't spoke to my friend from 'home' Angela for months and months. When I lived back 'home' we were inseperable even though she's married with two beautiful daughters. She's a soul mate .. you know the type, it doesn't matter what you say or do, they're your friend because they love and care for you. Well as I've said, for one reason and another ... we've not spoken for over two months.

I had a really 'orrible dream about Angela last night, and I was that upset by it, that I promised myself to phone her today. I was up early because I was still upset about the dream ... and I clock watched until 10 o'clock and then phoned. We were on the phone for hours and it was as if I'd only spoken to her yesterday - isn't that just the great thing about friendship .... no matter what happens - your friends are always there.

Say aya to great friendships - AYE !!!!!!!!

Drawers - not knickers !!!!

Stewart is 'trying' to build some drawers from a flat pack for my 12x12 papers - he's already stabbed the screwdriver through his hand ... and he's currently swearing his head off in the other room .... I think i'll stay safely ensconsed on my poot until he's managed to complete the task !!!!! Men and flat packs - they just don't go together !!!

Thanks for reading - i hope you all have a fabby weekend xxxxxxx

Tuesday UKS Blog

Prompt supplied by the luvverly Mandy.

What 5 thinks currently make you happy ?

IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER:-

1. My new One Heart ... One Mind - Metropolitan papers - wow are these lush papers or what ???

Thank you to my lubberly lubberly mate Lianne for surprising me with them xx

2. Fags - I couldn't live without one at the moment, i'm stressed to the max.

3. Surprise bottle of wine my luvverly hubby bought for me today, which is currently chilling in the frige.

4. My most-luvverliest Heir Apparent ... he just says the most thoughtful things when I need a boost. He makes me laugh, makes me smile, and reminds me why life is good, even when its not !

5. The fantastically, incredibliest, scrummiest, delishushiestliest ribbons from Little Silver Hat - wow wow wow .... am I impressed or what ....

Well, i've just read this list back... and it makes me sound like a really shallow person ... but sitting here right now, this second .. they're what makeme happy.

Update on Boiler

Thats the heating boiler not a bunny boiler.

There isn't an update. Its knackered. Kapoosh. Gone.

I'm sitting here naked while I'm typing this ... ok then ... i'm half undressed coz i'm waiting for the water to heat for a baff .... honest to god, this is no joke ... family are moaning coz i've opened the front door and put it on the latch, and the back door is WIDE WIDE open ... its cold, raining and horrible ... and i'm half naked .... *will say no more* I want a boiler !!!!

Plumber-type-company phoned Stewart today - they'll be there in 2/3 weeks - 2/3 week !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I told them we had no hot water and no heating - 2/3 weeks - what a joke !!!!

Its probably my fault for telling one of those 'white lies' that I hate other people telling ..... *insert woe is me smiley* *again*

Scrapbooking things ......

I've done two DT layouts, one tag book and a card ... need to do more, so will try and get another LO done tonight.... I have promised myself

College

I'm four weeks behind in my work and can't find my file ... i'm in deep doo doo because I HAVE to go on Thursday *insert another woe is me smiley*

Time

I have none.

Thanks for reading- love you all loads - Cal xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Moving Up .. CJ's ...... etc.etc.

Jeez - i'm worrying myself sick about what High School to send Aaron to. After much debate, Stewart and I have decided to leave the decision to Aaron. It seems that some of his friends are going to either one of two schools. One of them, I wouldn't have chosen, and went to Open Evening with very negative thoughts.

However, I was pleasantly surprised - in fact, I was really impressed. Of course I gave each department the 3rd degree and in most instances, they were happy to show me their past exam figures and also their Short and Long Term plans - believe me, there's not a lot of schools who would do that.

Anyway, we're visiting the second school on Thursday - which is the one I really would love him to go to but, we're out of the area *insert sad smiley* - so we'll have to see how it goes.

CJ's

I've just finished my entry for Kyms CJ (stamp galaxy) via the UKSTampers forum. Can't say too much, but the title of her CJ is Objects of Desire - bearing in mind, i'm feeling really fed up and miserable at the moment, sadly I think my entry has reflected that - although I really love the work that i' ve done - am I going mad or wot ??

Boiler

Our boiler isn't working - we can only get hot water if we put the heating on, and as i'm having hot flushes at the moment, its not helping having a hot house !!! I could grow banana trees in here !!!

After a visit from the Heating Engineer yesterday (an emergency visit), it became apparent that the flipping thing is knackered. We could spend about £100 plus labour (god knows what that will be) ... and it still might not be repaired - or we can go for a new boiler ....

How come when we think we're getting somewhere, something else goes wrong ???

I'm well cheesed off !

Sunday UKS Prompt

Five things that really peeve you off ..... oh, this should be sooooo easy for me !

1. 'Lifted' ahem ....pinched from Rebecca, but nevertheless its one of the things that really cheese me off ... People who do not indicate ... I mean WTF ?? why ? whats the sense ? When someone smashes into your arse-end, what are you going to write on your claim form? And don't get me on people who 'cut me up' Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr !

2. People who don't put things away ... why oh why do people, take the milk out of the fridge, make a cup of tea and then walk away ?? Uh ?? It just doesn't make sense to me - Stewart is forever taking things out and not putting them back. He'll take out the Argos book, bring it into the kitchen to read it on the kitchen table and then just walk away - why ????? Grrrrrrrrrrr !

3. Liars - I can't bear people who lie and white lies drive me even more insane, because there's no need for them ... mind you, it might be that I'm jealous because I can't lie for love nor money - you can tell in my eyes if I'm lying, because they tell everything - my eyes are very definitely my soul ! Grrrrrr !

4. Common courtesy - what happened to it ? Don't people teach their kids about courtesy anymore ? I will NOT give anything, lend anything or do anything unless it comes with a please and thank you. I hate bad manners - sorry, but another Grrrrrrrrrrrr !

5. Bullies - just the word speaks for itself. In school, I come down hard on bullies and I take no prisoners. Even in adult life - I hate bullying companies, banks who bully you into taking out loans you can't afford, bullying advertising campaigns ... you're a crap mother if you don't buy your child this or that ... it is all a form of bullying - and people need to start complaining.

If you get ship loads of junk mail - take your details off and mail it back - simple - they'll soon stop when their postage costs increase !!!

I Feel Chocolate Sick .... and Friday's UKS prompt

I Feel Chocolate Sick

I've just eaten half a bag (a very large bag) of Minstrels - bleurgh, I feel sick.

The problem is, is that I'm not naturally a chocolate lover - but when I do fancy and therefore eat chocolate, it makes me sick and have the 'trots' !!! So why oh why, do I buy the flipping chocolate when I know whats gonna happen when I eat it ???

*feels really sicky now*

Friday's UKS Blog Prompt

What were your favourite subjects in school? (This can be at multiple stages, such as primary school through to university.) What do you still love to learn or study or read about? What do you wish you had learned or studied?

At school I loved English Language, English Literature, Maths (up until my 2nd year at High School - they sacked my Maths Teacher and I was devasted, so hated it after that), Geography and PE.

I have always had a love of reading - Stewart doesn't read anything except the daily 'rag' (not my choice of daily paper - but hey ho each to their own)... and I just don't understand how he can not read a book ????

I have at least 2 or 3 on the go at the same time ... and I pick one up depending on the mood I am in at the time - I just can't imagine my life without a book in my hand at some point during the day !!

I especially love reading at night when I go to bed - I always allow myself at least a half an hour read - and I still read even when I've had a 'couple' !!! Granted, one eye is shut whilst the other is open, but I do try !!!

I also adore Maths. Sick I know. I just love finding number patterns !!

Geography - Ironically, I always thought that I would be the 'twin' who travelled and went off to far flung places - Never in a million years did I think that Colin would end up being a Sea Captain ! I am so proud of his achievements though, and I love it when he comes home from a long trip and describes all the wonderful places he's been to, and all the wonderful sites he's seen.

He's even been to an island dedicated to the conservation of sea turtles, and was invited not only to tour the island, but to swim with the turtles in the sea - I would have loved to have done that.

Then there's PE ... At school, I was in every sports team going - ok, so there was only Netball and Hockey - but that was still every sports team !!!!. I was even the school's high jumper when I was at Primary School, coz I was one of the tallest - sooooooooooo excuse me, but what happened ... why am I now knee high to a grasshopper but at Primary school I was one of the tallest ????? I wish someone could explain that one to me !!!!!!

UKS Blog Prompt - Thursday

Dreams, goals, fantasies, whatever you call them: Describe FIVE things you’d like to accomplish in your (future) lifetime. How do you plan to do them? What are you doing today to prepare for/do each of them?

I suppose most of my hopes and dreams are centred around Aaron.

1. I HOPE that I can start letting go of the apron strings a little bit with Aaron. It scares me so much to think of him growing up and going into the big wide world. He is my reason for being - and sadly only having the one, I find it harder than my friends to let go .... I am getting better tho !!

2. My next HOPE is that Aaron selects the right High School for himself. At the moment its between two schools - both of which some of his friends will be going to. He's been to the first one tonight, and he is well impressed. I really want him to go to the second one that we will be seeing next week, because their academic achievements are a lot higher than the school we visited tonight, and they are much higher up the league table.

However, I did a great deal of soul searching and have made a pact with myself and Stewart, that it will be Aaron's choice. He's a gifted child, and I hope that he will succeed whichever school he chooses. I'll update my Blog next week after visiting the second choice !!

3. I HOPE that Aaron will continue his education and go to University. I screwed up my school life and only took my qualifications once I had left school and realised what HUGE mistakes I had made. I did eventually go on to do my Maths Foundation degree, but I never followed it up. I HOPE he will have the good sense to learn from my mistakes.

I have tried to instill in him that he can be and do anything he wants - but that it is only him who can put the effort in - and only him who can fulfill his own dreams.

4. I DREAM that someone can come up with a cure for my luvverly Husband Stewarts bad back. He does have good days - but during the cold autumn and winter months, he really suffers and I could cry for him.

5. Lastly, one lickle itty bitty HOPE for myself - I HOPE that I have the willpower to give up smoking, lose weight, exercise more and improve the condition of my sadly depleting little old heart. I want my 30 year old heart back - PLEASE !!!! I promise I will look after it much better than I have previously done. I dread a lifetime of taking tablets - I hate em !!!

If I could have one major HOPE or DREAM, it would be for world peace. For everyone to be more considerate to other people's cultures and faiths, and for people to be more giving and forgiving.

End of sermon. xx

I've been Tagged .... again !!

This time the rules are: List 5 weird things about yourself or your pets. Tag 5 friends and list them. Then, those people need to write on their blogs about 5 weird things, and state the rules, and tag 5 more people.

OK .. five weird things about me ? Hmmmmm i'm not weird - i'm normal ... well, normal-ish ! Lets see what everyone thinks ....

1. I hate spiders or any 'insect-type-thing' that creeps, crawls or flies. I hate them with a passion. I check my bed before I sleep in it. I check the walls and ceilings before I fall to sleep. I check the bath and bathroom sink before I sit on the loo ... just to make sure there's nothing in there ... my life is totally controlled by these freaky weird insects - gross - bleurgh !!!

2. When I take off shoes, boots or slippers I have to check for 'fluff' in between my toes - I have to do it every time I take footwear off. I didn't realise how bad it was, until I first spotted Aaron doing it - he'd caught it off me and thought that 'thats what you do' !!!!

3. I don't trust anyone else's driving except my own. In my teens, 20's and 30's I absolutely loved speed ... the faster the better. Nowadays though, I'm awful. I feel physically sick when someone speeds over 80 when I'm in the car or on the back of a bike - god knows why its crept up on me .. but i'm awful for it. I'm also a terrible back seat driver and I drive Stewart absolutely up the pole with my comments 'watch this' 'oooh look at that' 'put two hands on the wheel' ... for gods sake - what is up with me ????

4. If I have a bath, I have to have a shower as well otherwise I don't feel clean. It makes me feel sick thinking about wallowing in dirt and then not washing it off properly. Hence why I prefer to have showers !!

5. When I make a cup of coffee I leave the spoon in the cup and then pour the hot water down the spoon. I've always done it, and I always have to comment when Stewart makes a coffee and doesn't do it the 'right way'. I always think that by doing it my way, you don't burn the coffee bean/granules, and that you get a perfect cup of coffee.

Adding on to this, I also don't like milk. I don't like the colour, the texture, the smell ... yeuch, it makes me wretch !

Anyway, I now need to tag five people ... so I vote for

Kym
Carrie
Lianne
Debbie S (can't leave her out)
Jaime

Fanks girls xx

'THE Bathroom', School and UKS Blog Prompt

UKS Blog Prompt

What’s your dream holiday destination? Why? What would you do on your holiday? How much time would you spend there? Who would you take with you?

South Africa. My twin brother Colin is getting married there at Christmas, and has invited us all to go over. Delene, his bride to be is South African, and her parents have a huge farm there. Its a 45 minute drive to the nearest small town, so you can imagine how desolate it is. When I say desolate, I don't mean dull and dreary or all brown and dry .... its a place of such beauty, that I couldn't even begin to describe the place.

Anyway, there's no way I can afford for the 3 of us to go over there ... its a couple of p (pennies) short of £4,000 plus we'd need spending money. We don't have to bother with presents though because my brother is a Sea Captain and Del is the Chef onboard, so they can't really have 'homey' things. No doubt when and if, they ever become permantly landed, then obviously I'd buy em something - don't want y'all thinking I'm a tight-arse or anything !!!!

My mum has just come back from a month away in South Africa with Del and Colin, and is absolutely raving about the place .... my brother has said that he would pay for our tickets, but I couldn't possibly go over there as poor as a church mouse, especially when its Christmas time ... anyway, once again i'm rambling and rabbiting ... anyway, South Africa, this Christmas is where I would like to be :)

Bathroom

Its finished - YAY !!!!!!!!!!!!!! Well all except the glass shelves and the loo roll, mirror, soap dish, toothy peg holder ... and the knob off the new shower. We bought the new shower over 2 years ago and when we unwrapped it yesterday, the flipping main knob was missing - can you believe this .... £20 for a new knob ..... OMG when did knobs become so expensive ??? AND..... £12 per sheet of toughened glass for the shelves .... AND £81 for special clippy things to hold on the bloody £12 per sheet glass shelves .... I tell ya ... i'm in the wrong game !!!

*investigates careers in glass ........ and knobs* !!!!!

School - includes strong language

Well where do I begin ... I had a wonderful 'saintly' sort of start to the day. Our RE Teacher wasn't in today, and I was asked to cover his lessons, which I didn't mind. BUT ... the lessons were about Muslim Courtship, Weddings and Divorce ... As our school has 60% Asian pupils, I thought to myself well this ain't gonna be a healthy debate .... anyway, as it turned out, the lessons all went brilliantly well. I learnt so much myself ... and the kids really enjoyed debating the different between Muslim and Christian weddings, divorce, courtship/relationships. I had to do four lessons on the same subject - and each one was different in their own way, but nevertheless enjoyable.

Then we get to this afternoon ..... with my own form. Well, I won't go into the dramatics of it all, but one kid in particular pushed all my RED buttons - which is lethal. I can take so much and then I blow ... but beyond blowing ... I go quiet, and thats when I'm dangerous.

This one kid gets away with murder, when he's in trouble he starts crying and shouting that 'it wasn't me, it wasn't me ... she/he is picking on me, it wasn't me' ... the louder he gets ... the more people believe him !!! It gets me sooo angry. Anyway, today was the icing on the cake ... so I reported him for his bad language ... he called me every 'mother fucker' going and continued with every swear word he could think of, but included 'fuck' or 'fucker' at the beginning and the end. As I say .......... enough was enough.

I went to see the year head at the end of the day .... I told him in no uncertain terms that if something wasn't done about him ... and properly done, then he would be handed my notice tomorrow morning. Thankfully, the child in question had also come to see the Year Head to tell him that he'd been getting picked on - Year Head brought him over and we tried to discuss the matter. Child once again, lost his rag ... stomped off calling me a heap of 'names' again ... but the last one was "fat mother fucker" ... and he shouted it right in front of the Deputy Head !!!

WOW - the gods were looking after me ... child has been suspended tomorrow pending an investigation ... so I have typed up the report of all reports to ensure this child is at least excluded for a week, but I'm pushing for permanent.

I'm not gloating - far from it - I work with these type of kids day in and day out, and it is my life-time challenge to help them and to change their lives - but this one kid is beyond help. No matter what I do or have done for him - I just can't break down his barriers. His mother was only 13 and put him up for adoption - and all his life, he has developed this hatred of women. It doesn't matter who the woman is, he hates em.

I have sadly concluded after 2 years, that he will only fully develop and make a headway in life under the influence of men. I feel I have let him down, but I am pleased that I understand why.

Thanks for reading this ..... if you have got this far, then I love you - Cal xx

UKS Monday UKS Prompt

What is your favorite fashion accessory or clothing item that describes you? Do you have any fashion phobias or fashion pet hates? What do you wear when you want just comfort? What makes you feel at your very most attractive? Do you have a fashion lucky charm (for example, something you wear to a first interview)? Anything you wish you could wear but don't feel you can?

My favourite item of clothing EVER ... was a red suit I bought. I was going out with a Naval Officer at the time, and I was priviliged to be invited to the launch of one of the submarines being built at Birkenhead. Anyway, I had to have a day time outfit and an evening ball gown. The evening gown was easy because I hired one ... and as soon as I saw it, I knew it was perfect. The red suit however took more shopping for than the outfit I wore for my wedding - I knew it just had to be spot on.

I had shopped everywhere ... Liverpool, Chester, Manchester... you name it, I went there ... at least 10 times each ... anyway, it was nearing the date and I was panicking. I popped into Birkenhead for some stockings to wear with my ball gown, and happened to walk past Richard Shops ... something red took my eye. I walked in ... and there it was .... my god, I felt more like a woman than Shania Twain ....... I tried it on ....... OMG it was stunning ... I felt more royal than the Queen, and yet more sexy than Madonna. Get this .... my Aunty Isobel had the hat to match the outfit !!!!! I couldn't believe it !

On the day, I had to be at docks for 8 in the morning as we all had to be cleared by the Port Police, Naval Police and probably even the FBI ... The launch was incredible and actually quite moving seeing all the 'lads' in their uniforms. As we were walking back to the room where we had to meet before being 'coached' to the day time celebrations, a little lad came running up to me ... "Hey Mrs he shouted, Mrs ....." as I wasn't a Mrs at this time, I didn't think he was calling me ... "oi, you in the red". I stopped and turned around. This cute little face looked up at me adoringly ... "can I have your autograph?" I could have cried. I said to him "I'm not who you think I am" .... "Yes you are, you're a lady" ....

Well needless to say, I signed his book and I gave him the Order of Service from the launch.

Not only was the red suit one of my favourite items of clothing, but the launch was one of the best days I've ever had.

Sorry for rabbiting on !!!

Friday UKS Prompt

Today's blog prompt is about friends and friendships: Do you have a true friend? What is a true friend, after all? Are you a good friend? Describe your friend(s) or perhaps need/wish for one. I found two quotes that might help: ‘Friendship isn't a big thing - it's a million little things’ (Author Unknown) and ‘A friend is the one who comes in when the whole world has gone out.’ (Grace Pulpit).

I consider myself to be a very lucky person. I have four true friends.

Firstly Angela - Ang was my brothers girlfriend for 10 years, and I just knew at the time that she would become my SIL. Things never worked out that way, but nevertheless, we remain best friends to this day.

Ang and her husband Tom are god parents to Aaron. During my pregnancy, Ang went through every sicky moment with me (believe me there were plenty), every moan, groan, push and shove - and when eventually my beautiful son was born, Ang and Tom were there waiting for us. Our joys were to be completed when six months later Ang gave birth to a DD and two years later to another DD.

I don't think there is anything that Ang doesn't know about me ... the good and the bad .... and the heaps of secrets ... all of which she holds close to her heart and would never reveal. She is my soul-mate, and I love her dearly.

Little Sue - she's been my longest standing friend. We've been through all sorts of trials and tribulations - our teens, 20's, 30's and now our 40's. We've gone through boyfriends, fiances, husbands and children. Sue has always been there for the good times and the bad times, with either a kindly word, or a bottle of wine to commiserate or celebrate !

Emily - is Emily. Salt of the earth, rough as a diamond, and a heart the size of the Universe. She's been there for me, and I know she always will.

Lianne - my newest best friend. I can't believe that I have only known Lianne for such a short time. Its as if she has always been in my life and was always meant to.

These words epitomise how I feel about my friendship with Lianne.

Did you ever know that you're my hero,
and ev'rything I would like to be?
I can fly higher than an eagle,
'cause you are the wind beneath my wings.

(Bette Midler)

Lianne is wise and wonderful, kind and caring and above all an honourable friend. She is a 'bestest friend', and my heart and life are more rewarded by her presence in both.

Lastly (I promise) ..... I have lots of other people in my life who I choose to call 'friend' .... My life has been blessed and fulfilled because of them. I like to think they are all 'best friends' because they allow little ole' me to be a part of their lives.

I love you all and thank you xxxxxxxxx

UKS Blog Prompt .... plus more !!

What part does music play in your life? What’s your favourite kind of music? Do you listen to music/radio when you scrap? If so, what kind? How does music affect your mood ?

Music is such an important part of my life.

My dad was a musician, so from being a babe in arms, music has always enveloped my life.

I can remember going to band practiced with my Dad all the time as a child. He played in several bands, groups, quintets, quartets etc., but on this particular day, the practice was for the BIG Jazz Band.

Dad played the double bass, and from my position in the wings, I could only see his little smiley face. The band struck up. I stood the whole time with my mouth wide open. I had never heard anything like it. The hairs on my neck stood up .... they were playing Blue Moon. To this day, I am reduced to sobs when I hear it being played, and I can remember the sheer joy written across my fathers face as he concentrated on the music and took himself off to his seventh heaven.

I play piano and guitar, and when I started playing, Dad was there enouraging me along. We'd play duets together when entertaining friends and family - and my Nana in particular used to love listening to the two of us.

I love all music. From Trad Jazz and big band .... to Led Zepelin ... from Nina Simone .... to Pink. I just love music.

In the words of Barry Manilow .... "Music is my first love, and it will be my last".

(well apart from my Aaron, but thats another story altogether ... talking of which, the layout shown is one I've just recently completed .. The picture was taken during a football tournament Aaron was playing in. They'd lost all their games and were absolutely desolate when, low and behold, they won again ... I think this picture titled "How Did That Happen" shows their reaction !!!!!

Thanks for reading my deranged postings - it means a lot xx

Its started !!!!!!!

The bathroom. OMG my house is like a bombsite. We're only doing the one room, so how come my whole house looks like a bombsite ???

Typically, nothing going right. This IS the house that Jack built, and if I get my sodding hands on him, I swear to god I won't let go of his testicles until they're in my hot little hand ....

The builder went to take off ONE tile just to make sure there was just one tile underneath, but oh no, .... there was .... and another ..... and then plaster .. the next thing was, the whole wall of tiles came crashing down ! Oh well, in for a penny in for a pound ... he pulled two off the next wall ........ crash ! All four walls where the same - I mean, who in their right mind, would have 3 layers of tiles AND a layer of cement inbetween each one ???? There is one benefit tho - I'll have about 6 extra inches length in the bathroom !!!

A tad later on, the builder decided to have a wee poke at the ceiling and take the light down as we're dropping the ceiling a little and having a lovely false ceiling put in ......... well we were ......... still are I suppose ... but, as is typical in this house that jack built ... the ceiling came crashing down as well ... I could cry honestly.

The poor builder and co-builder left at 8 o'clock tonight - i really did feel sorry for them ... so now, my bathroom needs new walls AND a new 'real' ceiling before they can continue *insert woe is me smiley*

By the way, this isn't a poor quality photograph, the spots and fuzzyness is the dust, still falling, after the ceiling caved in !!!

Aaaaah well - i've only got a whole house to clean now - anyone for dust & chips for tea ????

RIP Lynne

My celebrations about my friend Lynne coming round from being on life support have been short lived.

After only 1 day the hospital had to put her back onto life support because her body couldn't cope, and sadly she gave up her fight yesterday by having a massive heart attack.

I won't be able to say my final goodbyes due to being so poorly, and if I do recover by next Wednesday then I doubt school would be very happy with me if I took another day off.

I am therefore posting my goodbyes here.

I hope you're reading this Lynne because I want to thank you for all the deliriously, raucous happy times we've had - the laughs, which were bountiful and the wine, which was ever flowing.

Take care and Rest In Peace - Lynne has left the building. xx